Tuesday, March 22, 2011

And Here We Go Again

Just got back from an epic trip to the doctor's office. I've been putting off going in because, well - I just couldn't stand the idea of driving there AGAIN. But my sore throat keeps getting worse and this sinus thing is going on 3 weeks now and to top it off CeCe woke up with a fever. So off we went.
They were going to "work me in" this morning since they were all booked up and that meant that I had to take all 4 kids with me unexpectedly. This is something that I do not ever do. Ever. Because when they all get into a doctor's office or church pew something snaps and they become the most humility-inducing crew possible. They know that I can't do much immediate damage in these places (the doctor's office b/c you don't want SS called on you and church because you can only threaten in a hissing whisper) so they take advantage of this to act like thugs.
We were put in a room with a variety of loud toys. Fun was had by all but then the doctor walked in and I couldn't get them to stop making the noise. He has seven kids but they're grown now so I'm not sure what his tolerance for crazy is. But this was topping out my meter so I can't imagine that he was able to function well. I very much wanted his brain to be thinking about health and medicine and such but I'm sure it's hard to do that with "I love you, you love me. We're a happy family", playing loudly in the background.
So we turned to pretzels. And this was a serious miss-step. They bickered, they screeched, they stole, they crunched, they horded, they blatantly disobeyed. In spite of this, after I was seen and found to be positive for Strep (the one thing I was proud of for not having this year) I asked if they could check the Cecers out too on account of the fever and all. Our family has had run-ins with Strep so we don't like to mess around with it. Luckily we go to a family practice so they see her too and it wasn't a separate trip to the pedes.
This meant that not only did they have to work us in today but also give us a whole extra slot for the baby. But...I mean, I had to ask, right? And sure enough she does have it. Thomas probably does too but by then we'd really overstayed our welcome. Pretzels were crunched into the carpet - there were books spread to all four corners of the room, 1/2 the small people's shoes were MIA and Anthony was doggedly proclaiming Green Eggs and Ham over the fray. I was trying to clean this up ("could you, would you in a train?"), I turn around and there are Thomas and Rosie taking turns drinking out of CeCe's sippy cup. Fab. ("Eat them, eat them! Here they are!")
They continued to bicker about who was going to get the next drink (thirsty due to my brilliant move with the pretzles) all the way out to the front desk. Next, out of the corner of my eye I see Rosie reaching up for something. It's a cup - a cup in a little cubby in the wall - and yes, yes - it has "Urine Specimen" clearly written on it. The receptionist and I both holler at her to stop and catch her right before her hand clamps down on it. So, all in all I'd say the trip was a success.


  1. Uhhg! I do so know what this is like. And I'm so sorry you have strep. I'll pray that you and CeCe get over it quickly and the others have iron-clad immunity to it. At least the pretzels can be vacuumed...all is not lost.

  2. Oh, I have tears in my eyes from laughter. Thank you for writing like this about your life- it is going to make me feel so much better and less alone a few years from now. In the meantime I will put my one sick baby to bed now...

  3. Thank God my children are not the only ones who turn into thugs in public, confined places. And we see one of the other docs at Rob's office, so people are really looking to see how the kids behave. Not well, is the typical answer.

    Hope you and the gang are feeling better soon!

  4. Dying over here. Thank you for finding and recounting the humor it this ridiculous situation. The urine sample! The healthy kids drinking out of the strep victim sippy cup... oh Lex. praying for a speedy recovery for all involved!

  5. i can hardly stand this, so funny!