Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Oh the Humanity!

When we had 3 young children I often felt as if people were looking at me like I had 2 heads (well, I did sort of have 4). But deep down I thought that I was probably just imagining it. I mean, really, it's not like we're the Duggers or something. But now that we have four young kids I KNOW that people are looking at me. Because they tell me. I don't walk past a single person in the grocery store who doesn't make a comment about the quantity of Lovelettes and the overwhelmedness of the mom.
I think nearly all of them are very positive. When we had three I got a lot of, "are you done?" or "I was done at 2, I can't imagine 3!". But now that we have four the comments seem to have taken a turn for the positive. It's almost as if they look at me and know that I must be a horse of a different color and they should accommodate my eccentric child-bearing ways. So now I hear, "are you planning on having more?" or even more frequently, "my _____ (fill in aunt, grandma, best friend) has a lot of kids. It's nice, you don't see that much anymore." There is, of course, the constant, "wow, you sure have your hands full" but this no longer bothers me because it is a completely warranted observation.
When we had 3 I lived in fear that I would be embarrassed by their behavior, or my behavior, out in public. And sometimes I was. Now I simply count on it. I do not go anywhere without attracting lots of attention and it is ALWAYS because I've lost control of someone or simply lost someone. So we don't get out much. It's hard to walk into a place being completely certain that you are going to walk out embarrassed.
But the other day we had some errands to run that couldn't be put off anymore and so we all piled into the car and drove off to Lowes. We were chatting with people as we shopped because people always chat with us and random passersby were commenting on the quantity and ages of the kids and continuing on their way. There were even some pointers off in the distance. I was generally trying to just stay focused and get the hell out of Dodge when Anthony said, "Well. It looks like everybody's noticing us today."
"Yeah, it does look like that. Why do you think that is?"
He thought about it for a minute and concluded, "Because...we're cute?"
Yes! That is exactly it! I'll just take comfort in that thought the next time I feel like abandoning my grocery cart in the middle of the store and hightailing it out of there. MOST people out in this world like to see families and children. Sometimes I think that we give the few negative looks or comments far too much weight in our conversations as FertileMyrtles. Just remember that pregnant women are cute (I can say that since I am not!). 5-month olds are cute. 1 year olds are cute. 3 year olds are cute. 5 year olds are cute. And if you happen to have all of those things together you've got so much cuteness that people are bound to acknowledge it with a look or a comment.


  1. Great post Lex. And that is awesome that Anthony, boy who hates attention from strangers, understands what is really going on... being unbearably cute is hard to miss :) Love you!

  2. You Loves sure are a cute family! Thank you for your post! I love it! And...I can relate in many ways. ~Kathleen

  3. when we were in Rome, and everyone would stare at either two little kids and a pregnant belly, or three little kids--and of course Italians definitely stare in a way that leaves no doubt!, I would tell Gabriel, "they're just looking 'cause they're thinking, wow, what a lucky mama to have THREE beautiful children :)